Art Journal Take Two

The following pictures are from the first art journal I started. I was broke and didn't have much. So I used a large journal and glued pages together to make them thicker. I glued three pages together then tore out three so that once the book is done it won't be straining the binding.

If you click the images they will enlarge and you will be able to see more detail. When I get a good laptop I will use my good dslr camera and it instead of my phone.



This is the cover. Painted it brown and used scraps of scrapbook paper and stamps.




The first ever mixed media project I ever did was this page layout. I used some face and eye sketches from a old sketchbook. I added magazine cut outs. And painted the background. The quote says, "Few are those who see with their eyes and feel with their hearts," by Albert Einstein.




This one was done with oil pastel. Inspiration was a random image someone showed me.

"Love is shown in your deeds not in your words. Love blooms where the whole world can see in, in your thoughts and actions."




Paint, chalk, scraps, ink, and drawing.




Chalk and stamps.
"Hope is the thing with feathers, and perches in the soul and sings the tune without words and never stops at all."
Emily Dickinson




Pastels and sharpie
"Let your creativity bloom"





First test with making colored wash sprays and sharpies. Oh and a stamp.




A collage piece. There are lots of layers in this one. Painting. Magazine cutouts. Stamps. The doll is made from napkins. Her body and face was ink.




Left over ink on stencils from a project. And practicing with new stamps.




Out of all my projects and art journal this is the page I dislike the most. It turned out too busy for me.
I used thickers on a page. Covered it with polkadotted tissue paper and used matte gel to paste it over. Used some ink over the words to help them stand out.
Added stamps and stenciling. And some buttons.

"Life is an adventure you must explore"




The heart on the left was a cut out from a page where I was practicing dripping ink.
The words are lyrics from a song our worship leader wrote. My favorite.




Using a credit card to paint. Added some stamps.




Using cheese cloth as texture I felled it down. Then used sprays and paint. I also used modeling paste with stencils. Tissue tape strips and prima flowers were added as well. More stenciling.


And that's it for this journal so far! Any details you have questions about please ask!


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BT: Beauty Blender vs Blending Sponge

So tonight's Beautiful Tuesday post will be a comparison/review.

The Beauty blender (actually a dupe) vs a blending sponge (generic form).

Now several months ago I had read about the Beauty Blender. It's a pink (the original one is, it now comes in black too I believe) tear drop shaped sponge that you get damp then use to apply liquid or cream make up products. (Usually foundation and concealer) You put some product either on the back of your hand or on your face and then with a bouncing, stippling motion you pay the product onto your skin with the damp sponge. It leaves a great blended finish on you skin and works well with hiding blemishes.

Now the original Beauty Blender is about 20.00 and will last around three months I think. The website isn't clear on this but that's about how long I used mine before it just got to the point where I felt I needed a new one.

A friend did get me the original. And I loved it. I wish I had pictures for you but alas I do not. Warning, your foundation will stain the sponge material but if the water runs clean after you wash it then its clean. You should wash your Beauty Blender after each application of makeup. Beauty Blender even makes a cleanser for it. You can check it all out at their website beauty blender.net. I used a soft makeup brush shampoo for mine.

Now, when it was time to buy myself a new one I didn't really want to pay the 20.00. There are dupes everywhere for it. Some look the exact same and some have a weirder shape. Sonia Kashuk (a brand at target) has one that's 14.99 I believe and it's the weird shape one. And then target had its own brand ( up and up) that looks just like it for 4.99.

I bought the target brand. It was more budget friendly. Here is what is looks like.




(Please ignore the badly chipped nail polish!)

See! Weird shape! Oh and I had used it a couple of times before the pictures so you can see the stains I mentioned earlier.

I did not like this sponge. One, I don't really like the shape. It felt awkward to me. Second, the material is completely different. It's much denser and heavier. It took more effort to get the blended look I wanted.

The Sonia Kashuk one may be better but as I didn't like the shape to begin with I decided not to try it.

But I wanted another one like the original. One day while I was at T.J. Maxx I saw they had a dupe. It was in a clear box. I have already forgotten the name that was on it. Something generic.
Anyway, it was teal and only 4.99. So I bought it. It looks like this.




I loved this! It's the same shape as the original. I feel like its just as soft and bouncy when I use it. I could not be happier.

One of the things about the Beauty Blender that I find fun (because inside I'm still a little kid) is that when you get it wet, it gets bigger. Almost double in size, not quite. It's like those little dinosaur pills I had when I was a kid. You drop the pill in water and wait and the Dino would pop out and grow larger. Yeah, that's what it remiss me of.

Here are some photos. The top picture will be it dry an the bottom is after I got it wet.








I tried to keep my hand the same distance for those photos. Not quite. But you can still see the difference right?

Well, I hope this post helps someone. Let me know your thoughts if you have tried one or the other or are interested.
Any questions are always welcome!


- Posted using BlogPress from
my iPhone

Art Journal Take One

Hey there! Today I decided that I would show you all one of my art journals. (I have four... Well five if you count my moleskine)

Over the the next few Saturdays I shall showcase a journal and then as I add to those journals I will do updates. Sound good? Hope so.

I apologize if the pictures aren't great. I'm using my iPhone.
If you have any questions about details, please feel free to leave a comment!!!!




This is the cover of one of my art journals. It is actually the third one I started. It was sent to me from a friend off of a mixed media Facebook group. We did a swap where we had to create a cover and one page in an art journal four our partner. This is what my partner did for me. If you want more details about that, there is a video on my YouTube channel.
(createwithapurpose is my screen name) maybe I will edit a link here once I get on a computer)




This is the page my partner created for me. My favorite part is the stitched look on the hearts.




Here is the first page I created in this journal. I was playing around with some new stamps I bought from Tuesday Morning and some home made color sprays. (Water and acrylic paint)




I had a hard time getting this in focus to read. I did this page during church one morning. It was inspired by the song a friend was singing during service. I adore this song. I just used sharpies.




This one is just a background I did using Gelatos by Faber Castell. I was testing them out along with a stamp my mom bought me.




Here I was just doodling with a black sharpie.




Another black sharpie doodle. This one was inspired by a picture a friend of my did and posted to Instagram.




This I also did in sharpie and was inspired by Pinterest.




Again, sharpie. I was practicing some zentangles.




Sharpie doodle, yet again.




I ordered from a mixed media/scrap booking company at the beginning of the year (feb or march ish) and wanted to use some immediately. So this page was created.
I did the tag first. Then the background on the page. Then over a few hours during commercials (I was watching a movie on tv with my mom) I would randomly add things.
There are stamps, crackle paint, scraps of paper, metal clock, stickers and stamps all on here. I also used some more homemade sprays and doodle pens.




And last but not last forever, here is the sketch I shared with you all last Artful Saturday.
Cheers!
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Wax on, wax off

Cheesy title, yeah I know. But let's talk wax.

Beauty is pain blah, blah, blah. I just hate plucking and shaving. Now I haven't had the chance to have my legs waxed yet but I will.

Mostly I wax my eyebrows and yes I do them myself. I don't feel like paying ten bucks every two weeks when I can pay six dollars and have wax that lasts me several months.

Someone asked me why pay for wax when you can make sugar wax with stuff in the kitchen. Now, I am all for trying all natural routes. I mean I stopped using shampoo and I make my own shaving lotion. So I gave it a try.

I should have taken pictures, it was such a messy disaster. It took forever to cook. I followed the directions (it had pictures) and it looked exactly like the pictures. It was so sticky. But it wouldn't stick to my hair. At all. Nothing!

So I caved and bought my old faithful wax by Sally Hansen. No, I can't pronounce everything in it but it works. I'm good with it for now.

And that's all I got for Beautiful Tuesday number two! Now to go wax my eyebrows!


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Feeling a little Garfield

Today was a day!

I felt like I needed that shirt from Garfield that states "I hate Mondays."

Working in a room full of nine tiny toddlers (okay some are not tiny) who can't use words so they have to scream and cry when you have a migraine makes you really want to skip the day.

That was today. Today is Monday. I am not very fond of this Monday.

So today, just call me Garfield.
Bring on Tuesday!




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Last minute still counts right?

Artful Saturday still managed to make its debut. About half an hour before Sunday! ;-)

I'd been meaning to write a post all day. But the day snuck away from me before I realized.
So its not the repost of old art blog pieces and as random and last minute as this post is, it's still here!

I thought I'd just share the last two sketches I did recently and a few artistic quotes I came across the last two day.

Sketches first:

This first one I saw is an arrow idea I'm tossing around as one of my arrow tattoos. I plan to have several small ones on random places but that's another post.




This second one is a little picture I saw on Pinterest and thought was adorable. The left side is the original and the right side is my attempt. It's called practice for a reason.




Generally I stay away from realism. Because it takes the most practice and concentration. Yet, I want to get better so I better stop being so lazy about it!

Time for the quotes now!

Which I also stumbled upon on Pinterest!











The second piece was a quote from Pablo Picasso.

And that's that! I promise more forethought will be put into the next Artful Saturday post. Stay tuned! And tell your friends! Please!

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Beautiful Tuesdays : Introduction

Welcome to Beautiful Tuesdays! (Yes I realize this is Wednesday but this was all typed up yesterday and then my internet fizzled on me. So I'm posting it today!)

Today my post is more background than anything. The whys and hows of my beauty interest.

~~WHYS~~

First of all, I am a woman. ;) I believe that women were given a special gift to see and make beautiful things. (Not that men can't) Beauty inspires us. It touches that soft spot in our hearts and makes our lips spread in that smile that radiates to touch the lives of people around us. Beauty is loving our family and friends. Beauty is found in revamping furniture or a room into a home. Beauty is having fun with makeup to look your best, not look like your friend. Beauty is pampering yourself and loving you. Beauty is being the best you possible. Beauty is NOT copying the magazines. It's NOT going broke buying the latest trends. Beauty is NOT starving yourself to have a size two figure.

"Beauty is how you feel inside, and it reflects in your eyes."

Love that quote, no idea who said it.

I believe beauty is a feeling, one that everyone, every woman and girl especially should feel. That whole "be your own kind of beautiful" isn't just a cliche. There is truth in that. You are beautiful. You just have to capture it and own it. And its up to you when and how you show it to the world.

Second, I'm a very creative/artsy person. And I treat my body like a canvas, one that I can recreate each day...sometimes twice a day. Make up, clothes, hair, jewelry...tattoos and piercings are all mediums that can be used to decorate the body with.

~~HOWS~~

I learned make up mostly through trial/error and of course, YOUTUBE. ;) It really is a great place to learn anything. (I also learned a lot of my art techniques from watching youtube) There are some seriously talented people that have youtube channels giving away information that is pretty easy to pick up and try on yourself. Though be warned, the more you watch the more makeup you might be tempted to buy. Just know drugstore is mostly as good as high end.

For my style, I just go with what I like. Yes, I participate in some trends. SOME. The ones I like and the ones that look good for my body type and personality. I don't wear things because they are IN right now, nor do I not wear something because its NOT IN right now. I wear things because I like them. However, I will admit that I have not worn something because its IN and I see it everywhere so much that its annoyed me. My wardrobe is about to get a major addition to it because once I start school in September I have to wear all black. I don't have any all black clothing in my wardrobe except once pair of pants. So off to Goodwill and sales racks. That's another thing, I don't have a whole lot of money to spend. The majority of my shopping is sales and thrifting, not full price.

Hair....what can I say other than Pinterest and practice.  ;) Oh and of course YouTube as well. (Now you know what I do in my spare time huh?)

Well that's about it for now. If there are any questions, feel free to ask. I will answer. Please.. ASK!!!

Monday Musings: New Chapters

Monday Musings.... Ya like? I'm sticking with it. Monday Musings will be my posts about my personal life. They will be updates, rambles, and thoughts from my own little head. Mostly.
Along with Monday Musings, I will be doing Beautiful Tuesdays. These pieces will feature posts about beauty, (Hair, Makeup, skin care, clothes, inner beauty). Then on Saturdays, I will be updating on my art journey. For those posts, I have decided to start out by reposting some things from my other blog, the art one. Once I repost some of those, that blog will be deleted seeing as it will have merged with this one.
I also thought I might do random specials which will have names later and be posted whenever inspiration bites. 

Oh, speaking of this one. I mentioned a new look in my last post. What do you think? A little more girly with a vintage aspect. Just trying this on for a bit to see how I like it. It may change again a couple of times til I find one I'm comfortable with. I want some opinions though when I change it. After all, I'm not the only one looking at this blog. Or am I?

New chapter time!

In about two months I shall enter into the Paul Mitchell world of Cosmetology! I've been up to my elbows in paper work and phone calls and finances the last week or two trying to see if this will happen. And God answered some prayers, my parents jumped on board as well so on September 16th I will be a Paul Mitchell Student. I go on the 15th of this month I believe to sign some papers and turn in my application and deposits. I'm ecstatic and this feels surreal. It may not hit me until I walk through those doors on my first day of class. My goal will be to try to keep you guys updated if you are interested.

Well that is all for this Monday. Enjoy and leave feedback. Please! :)

My Friend is Brilliant and Make Over

In my last post I mentioned trying to get better at blogging as well as adding a beauty blog to the my other two blogs even though I find it tough to keep the two I have up. I was talking to my friend about it and she gave me a brilliant idea. I’m going to combine my blogs. It will be so much easier managing the one blog and it isn’t the end of the world combining my topics. In fact, it might be more entertaining. So this blog will be getting a bit of a make over/overhaul.

Then I had to think about how I’m going to do this. I could pick certain days and do a certain topic on that day, like Beauty Tuesday, Monday Musings, etc. This also gives me a deadline to work toward and I do well with deadlines. They make things real for me. Or I could just do headings when I start a post that way you all know what that post will be about. That way I won’t be tied down to just doing that topic on a certain day….

I think I like the certain days though better. Deadlines sound good to me. Now to just come up with names...

I'm also thinking if I will just start over on my art blogging or import my other blog into this one. I haven’t decided yet. 

Please, bear with me while I make this transition. But I hope you enjoy this new journey with me. 

If you have any suggestions on names of the certain post types, feel free to leave a comment. 

Never going to give up.

It is more than obvious that keeping a blog current and up to date is a bit hard for me. I've always known that. It's been a struggle for a while ever since I abandoned Xanga. (Sometimes I miss those days - The days of being a teenager and having no life) And yet, I keep trying. Not only that, but I decide to try and run two blogs. This one and my art blog.

Truth is things happen. I get interrupted and my ways of maintaining these blogs are questionable. My computer isn't the greatest (its actually a netbook) My internet went out for a while. I get lazy. My camera stops working or my crafty mojo stops (for the art blog)

But no matter what there is still this lingering desire to keep trying to be a better blogger. Why? Who knows? Its not because the hype of blogging. It's not because I want to make money out of these blogs really. I don't even know that I want loads of readers (that would mean I would HAVE to write more often lol)

I think its because there is something in me that needs to get out. I feel that I need to work toward something. I like to write. I like my art. I like sharing what I've learned. Thus I will keep trying.

Oh and not only will I keep trying on these current two blogs but am highly considering another blog.
I had tossed the idea around of giving this blog a make over. However, I like this one being my personal blog and I don't want to lose that. And I really want to keep up the art blog. But I also really want to do a beauty/style blog. (Like there aren't enough out there already) Mostly I want to do one for my friends around the world who want to get more into beauty things but haven't a clue where to really start and can't just go shopping with me whenever they want. :) You know who you are. ;)

Yeah, so, this is me, trying again.

Oh yeah, and I haven't forgotten that moleskine comparison yet. It's still coming.

Update and Moleskine adventure

About the last post of mine speaking of working out and getting healthy....BAH! lol.
I am eating more healthy now and might have lost maybe 5-10 lbs. But the working out was a bust. Messed with my knee about two weeks into it. So needless to say I abandoned it. Then the holidays hit. So yeah, that's that. My new plan is Just Dance 4 on our new Wii. It's definitely a more fun way of cardio and moving anyway and doesn't seem to mess with my knee as much.

~~

Well it's a new year! And with that comes fasting and preparation for this new year. For the first 21 days of January I am fasting some social media (facebook, pintrest, instagram). During this time I've started reading and going through the St. Ignatius Adventure book.

~~

Oh and I'm going to do my first review/comparison on here. It will be on Moleskine Legendary Notebooks vs. Markings by CR Gibson journals. I've ordered a Large Plain Moleskine from Amazon (currently waiting for it to arrive) and bought a Markings journal from Target. Once I have them both in my hands I will begin my reviews/findings on here as I use them both. I'm excited about this little adventure. First I want to see what the big deal among my fellow artisans and creative minded people is about the Moleskine and if there is a reason why its so much better than the Markings journal I see all the time at Target. At first glance they seem like the exact same thing. So I want to see. :)

Sometimes being sore is a good thing....right?

                Responsibility is a word I think about often. Sometimes I miss the days when I was a kid and the only real responsibilities I had were listen to my parents, have fun and do my schoolwork. Then there are days when I wonder when I will actually feel like an adult. I thought it would be when I paid my first bill. Yeah, no. Then I thought it would happen when I moved out of my parent’s place. Almost, but no. Then maybe when I finally got my own car and drove around a lot by myself. Not really. Maybe it will happen once I’m married…I’ll let ya know when that happens if I feel like an adult then.

As I look back though, I feel (and have been told) that I mostly carried responsibility well. It was just something you did. What I haven’t done well is take certain responsibility for my body in all areas. I was always a thicker child. Not really big but not skinny by any means. I got curves early. In school it was easier to maintain a healthy weight, I did sports until my illness took me out for three months my sophomore year of high school. In those three months I gained like fifteen lbs thanks to bed rest and steroids. Then my school got really small and was too small for many sports after that. (Private school)

I danced for church and that helped me maintain but I never really got smaller. I was okay with that mostly. But I never saw it as a priority.

Then I moved back home last August from two years in Master’s Commission. Things happened and I basically stopped dancing on a regular basis. My back started hurting again as well. Here it is a little over a year later and I’m disgusted to say I’ve gained about 20 lbs since being back home.

One day recently God cornered me and we had a chat about my responsibility to myself, to him and to my future family in taking care of my body. Not only is it bad for my health but it’s bad for my ministry. I can’t reach my full potential, I can’t be completely used the way God wants to use me if I’m not in good physical shape. I had NEVER looked at it that way before.

 So I had set a date and picked out this cool workout schedule alternating dance and small weights strength training (cause I hate running, tried it a few months ago and just can’t get into it, maybe I’ll try again who knows) and then the day I wake up to start…I have the flu. I know right? So now I’m having to re-motivate myself into wanting to do this routine. I started today and I am so completely sore, please pray. I’ve never been too big into exercising but when God put it into perspective to me it means something to me now. As Paul said, the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak. My flesh is really weak in this area. I have had issues with weak knee and some pinched nerves in the past. I have to be really smart about this and let the Jesus in me be my strength because I won’t be able to do with without him.

Or encouragement/accountability. So if you are reading this, every once in a while check on me, ask me questions and tell me to keep it up! J

It would help if I was competitive like my brother but I’m not really. So my focus is My Lord, my ministry and my desire to have a family. I just have to take it one day at a time.

Complete opposite sides of emotions.

Our emotional capacity amazes me. The Lord made them so intricate and our mind/heart is able to feel so many things at once. Especially women. That is one of our gifts, the emotions of God., we as women are his heart so to speak. That doesn't mean men can't feel a vast array of emotions so don't stick that between my lines please.

Last week was the launching of New Life Church's life groups. It was fun. It had a tailgating theme. Football team logos were everywhere. Photo booths were up and on full blast. You had a photo session and then it printed two strips. One for you to keep, one for you to pin to the life group board of your choice. There were so many to choose from. I ended up picking two actually. One meets every Monday evening and the other is every other Tuesday evening. I couldn't choose between the two so I'm going to try both out.

Last night was the first night for the Monday group, Heart and Soul. It's an all women's group (so it the other actually) and all the women are in their 20's. It was a great night. Mostly introductions. You know, everyone sits in a circle and goes around telling a little bit about themselves and then kicking themselves later cause the realized they forgot they should have said "blah" but instead the said "blah". So, here I am, listening to everyone and thinking that someone ( or more)  is this room could end up being a life long friend. There is potential for really strong relationships. I was excited. I was also scared out of my ever loving mind.

See, before Master's Commission, I made surface friends. I grew up in a place where friends left, or I left a lot. I didn't get too tied to anyone for the fact that I knew they would leave and I didn't want pain. Then in Master's Commission I was pushed to understand and make real relationships. The kind that are going to hurt but you know they are important so you fight for them. It actually took my second year before these relationships got really solidified. And then when I moved back home. I was stuck. I really had a hard time missing people. And the friendships I had before MCs just weren't there to try and delve into deeper. I tried with one girl but life is fast paced and while we are great friends, she's not exactly someone I can go to for advice really. Not yet at least, one day I hope our friendship reaches that point. And there weren't a lot of people left at my church at the time that I had relationship with. A lot had left. And the culture there is not about relationships anymore like it used to be. And so then My parents and I made the decision to follow God where he was leading us to NLC. I came to life again. I realized I had felt dead, disconnected despite the efforts to get plugged in.

At New Life it was home. It reminded me of the atmosphere of MC's. Of CLC. You walk in and immediately you feel like you belong. We started finding places we could serve, and we felt wanted again. That was Easter. However, despite feeling wanted and needed in the Church, I was still missing that intimate connection of a close friend. But I knew God had his plans and I kept waiting for them to unfold. I'm slowly making friends.

 This is where the emotions came in. I was sitting there at my life group, scared out of my mind because I realized that I was going to be opening my heart to these ladies. The insecure thoughts of "could I trust them" and "will they hurt me" and "was I strong enough to do this again" and several other questions raced through my mind. And at some point, a girl was sharing a story that had similarities to mine and I heard God's gentle reassurance. This was worth it. Because I risked it three years ago, I have some friends that I hold so close to my heart now and would do anything for. To add to my heart more people like that...it will be worth it.

Add to that scared and excited feeling the feeling of sadness. Because while I was contemplating these potential relationships, I was extremely missing my classmates. Thankfully, there is technology and they are only a text or phone call away. :-)

Sigh. Yes I just typed a sigh. Because that about sums it up now for me.

I am just about finished with a book, "Let Me Be A Woman." Expect a blog post reviewing that book to come soon!

Other side of me

Plug Alert!

I've recently started another blog and while I will still keep this one up, I will probably post in the other one more! And as it is centered around the journey of a great passion of mine, I would really appreciate those of you who follow this blog, to follow that one if you are interested in getting a peek inside my crazy creative mind! And spread the word to any one who might be artistic because I'd love input and for others to share with me their creative journey! Thanks.


Here is the link to my other blog. Create With A Purpose!

Season of Change

1. Ecclesiastes 3
   There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, ...

I can say that, without a doubt, I am in a season of change and of new beginnings. I have been in this season since moving from Oklahoma City (where I had lived for two years, in case you are just now tuning into my life) back home...with my parents...in Conway, Arkansas. That was this past August. Which was almost a year ago. Wow.

Anyway, it hasn't been easy. At all. So much has happened. It has been a time of constant transition. And I am not sure I handled it as gracefully as I should have. I know I didn't do it as gracefully as I wanted to but then again I have high expectations for myself. You could say that it was the beginning of my trip off Mountain MCOKC to the Valley of Starting Over.

First, there was the adjustment to living back at home with my parents. Yay!.... lol. No, I am thankful for this most of the time. But often I am hitting up against a wall. The wall of Adulthood. I am 24 years old, and have lived on my own. I have lived in a completely different state than my family, had a completely separate life from my family. I have bills that I pay (God always provides) and have had 'adult experiences'. I am, in most people's eyes, an adult. However, I am, and always will be, my parent's child. I am in their home and they still take care of me in some ways. I do carry my weight around the house, and do my share and more to keep up with the responsibility of the home. I do not consider myself a 'free loader' and neither do my parents. Yet, there are still times where that line of child/adult gets blurred. Usually, when butting heads against my mom. But I love her. I know she loves me. But its still an adjustment for all involved.

Second, there is the reinsertion back into my Church. Having been away for pretty much three years, ( I didn't go all that much the year before MCs due to college and a case of apathy) it was not the church I remembered. Staple people in my life from that church were now no longer a part of the church. God had called them away for His reasons. New people had been called into the body. People who were still there that I knew had changed quite a bit in the years I had been gone. So, in essence, it was like entering a new church. Because, in reality, I had changed quite a bit as well. I am not the same woman I was when I left Victory to go to MCOKC. And people didn't always realize that. I came up against the very expectations I was warned about. However, the Lord gives grace. :) I had a vision of what the Lord expected from me now. And so I met with Pastor Paul and Pastor Robbie. I wanted to serve the church and wanted to carry on their vision, especially the Generational Transfer part. After all, the congregation supported me in going to MCs so I wanted to give back all that I had learned. We talked and things seemed like it would go well.
However, it did not. Doors just did not open like I expected. So I dealt with it. I prayed, I waited. I sought the Lord and counsel from others in my circle. I was blessed in a having a relationship with a very dear man, Rick Cramer, who was doing the Sunday School for teens and young adults. He really blessed me both in encouragement and finances to open up prophetic art. Where there were no funds, he donated. It really blessed me and he has forever touched a tender place in my heart. Still, I was restless.

Ultimately, what it came down to was that God was preparing me for a bigger change. If all the doors I wanted to open had opened I would not have been in a position to open the door he was about to open for my whole family. Dad called a family meeting so to speak. Which is very rare in my family. He opened his heart about how he felt God calling us to a new church body. He asked us to pray with him about this and to seek God. So for a couple of weeks we did. It all fell into place. The Lord was calling us away from Victory Fellowship. It was bittersweet. Victory Fellowship is a dear family of mine. It was my first home church. It really opened my eyes to deeper levels of intimacy with the Lord and different facets of my life. It was where I began to blossom. But just like I had to move to a different garden for a season to do MCs, I was now switching gardens again to go to a different church. I will always love the people of Victory. And I believe I am still in covenant with the people of Victory. The verse that God finally had to show me to help me make the switch was Luke 14:26 “If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters—yes, even his own life—he cannot be my disciple."  Now, this does not mean I'm supposed to hate Victory and its congregation. But it means I have to put God and his leadings ahead of what I want, or others expect of me. It was hard. I can't explain how hard.

So the third major transition is a new church! New Life Church in Conway is our new place of ministry. And the Lord has given me and my family a love for the ministry and it's people. God definitely gave us grace and favor. It is a breath of fresh air. It is where we belong for this season. And we have been with NLC since the Sunday after Easter. My brother, who has been with the church since he joined Cadre two year ago, is a vital  part of their Cadre program and the major transition that it is going through. My mom has already started working with the Little Life program, (for infants to five year olds) helping with their worship service part. And I have been given a paid position to run Blends, their coffee house. I just started training today. And it has definitely opened me up to get to know the people I am going to need to know. I feel like I have an inkling of why I am at New Life. But it will be a joy to watch God's plan unfold as he clicks things into place.

The fourth transition was my job situation. To me it was a small transition but sometimes the way other people handled it was stressful. I started working at the daycare that my mom works at. It was a nice job, nice pay, nice benefits and I loved what I did. However, it started to play on my heartstrings a lot! There were a lot of stress factors that began to build up and eventually I got the okay from the Lord and my parents to quit that job. It took a while but I found a temp job with a temp agency. But it was hard on my eyes, it triggered lots of migraines and in the end I was just not keeping up with their expectations and quotas. So I was let go. Grace was given to me for that, I was actually relieved! But then came the stress of trying to find another job. Most the time, I was able to handle it. I knew God has his reason, his plans were in the works. It was a game of do what I feel I need to and...wait. I only had one big bill, my brother's car payment and I had already taken care of it. It was paid off before I got let go. The other bills which were my phone bill and driver's insurance were smaller and my parents helped out and was able to babysit here and there. Now, I have a part time job with the church and it will take care of those small bills plus be enough to take care of my personal expenses. I may or may not try to get another part time job in the evenings if I feel I can handle it. But for now, I'm adjusting to the current routine.

I do believe this is the beginning of the ascent up out of this current Valley and onto another Mountain. Their may be a few more Valleys on the way but the Lord is with me, leading me step by step. And that's all I need.

Pretty Is Not Enough

Pretty is not enough.... So the new Bare Escentuals commercial got me thinking. The slogan says “Pretty is what you are, Beauty is what you do with it.” I was curious about that statement and captured by it. I asked the Lord why? It sounds weird and like its telling people that who they are isn’t enough. So then I researched the slogan and the company. http://www.nytimes.com/2011/09/02/business/media/for-bare-escentuals-pretty-isnt-good-enough.html?pagewanted=all That’s the link I read. It tells of how they picked the models for the campaign, not on what they looked like but on personality based questions the models had to answer. The company never even saw the models they picked until they were getting ready to shoot the campaign ads.They wanted to make sure they had role models not just models. One they picked was a volunteer firefighter and another was a mother of three who played basketball and rode a motorcyle. They wanted real women who did real things. They also did not retouch the models. They left in every wrinkle and imperfection that might be seen as bad, but because it spoke of their life lived, they called it beauty. ” “We can all be pretty, but beauty is an action,” said Leslie Blodgett, the executive chairman of Bare Escentuals. “Hopefully it’s a rally cry for ‘Don’t just be pretty and sit there and get your picture taken and do nothing.’ ” And this got me thinking about the Kingdom of God. God made us special people, he gifted us and we are his sons and daughters. We ARE. But most of us sit around and do nothing. We sit in our churches and listen but then go home unchanged. We blame everyone else for why nothing radical is happening but we don’t realize that it is up to us to live radically to see radical things. So I’m encouraged. A son or daughter is what we are. But we must do something with it. We must put it into action, we must live it out. I don’t think Bare Escentuals intended to cause that kind of thinking but I know I thank God for that little nugget of truth at the most random time.

By the word of their testimony

So here are a couple of testimonies I had to write about Tour this year and the trip to Costa Rica. Later when I have more time I shall write more about my experience in MCs this year and try to include the bigger lessons I've learned along with the few mentioned in the following paragraphs. Enjoy~


"Last year during tour I had to deal with my knees going out on me and I learned how to let the Lord pull me into him and use his strength. This year going into tour I had 12 pinched nerves. I couldn’t understand why the Lord was letting this happen to me again right before tour. But through all the confusion and hurt, I once again relied on the Lord. His grace on me knows no bounds and I believe he took me to a different level of relying upon him. There is no way I did any amount of dancing of my own accord. Every move I made happened because of Christ living in me and having grace on my body. Through the pain and tears I was able to see the Lord’s hand in everything. Lives were touched through the dances and I can’t take any of the credit which is how it should be. Because of this, ALL of the Glory had to go to the Lord. There was no saving any of it for myself, I couldn’t claim anything. It was cool to see that people were responding to the God in me, instead of just a cool move I’d learned to do.

Costa Rica was a different experience than tour in drastically different ways and I cannot really compare the two and do justice to either. I still had pain but had learned to push past it with the Grace of God. It was easier to allow myself to be swallowed by His Grace in order to move which left me able to focus more on people. And they were desperate. The people of Costa Rica left such an impression on me that I felt convicted. Here these people were, running to the Lord for any type of prayer they could get. Several people on several occasions had no complaint or purpose for asking for prayer other than the soul reason of seeking an encounter with God. Do we do that here in America? I know I don’t. Normally it takes a moving of the Lord to get me to go up for prayer…or for that matter, it takes someone coming and getting me! How I want to be that desperate! To be a sponge that will soak up any drop of water someone decides to let drip. They were truly precious and I know the Lord had encounters with those people. How do I know? Because they were desperate for one and kept seeking until they got it."

AHHH! Are you for real???

WOAH. Today we leave for Costa Rica! I still can't believe it. I'm up and packed and got passport in hand (so to speak) but I still don't believe it. Someone pinch me! It seems like we just got back from tour and now we are off again on one of the greatest adventures of our life. Lord, I know you will provide a great outpouring of your anointing and spirit.

I'm excited...really excited. A little nervous. I'm kinda lacking in the Spanish department, though I have to admit Jessica Camenisch is a great teacher and I've learned loads in one week. I'll be staying with host homes that don't really know english. Talk about out of comfort zone. But it will be great because I have to totally depend on the Lord. Jesus hold me cause I'm freaking out...in a good way.

Ariana and Moises...here we come!

By the Word of the Lord...

We will demolish every evil thought that tells us we are worthless. We shout and proclaim that in Jesus Christ we are priceless- we do matter in this world.
(2 Cor 10:5)

We declare the tearing down of the false idols Baal and Asherah. No longer will we give our children as sacrifices to Molech.

We are crying out for those whose voices are being silenced. There is hope for the unborn and it shall not be cut off.
(Prov 23:18 & Prov 31:8)

The womb is intended for God's creative action of life, not man's destructive action of death.

We are ambassadors of Reconciliation and declare that Love is long suffering. So be strong, be brave and don't give up for those whose hope is in the Lord shall be given renewed strength.

(3-18-11)

Untitled and Unfinished

Glass warped, a house of fun.
Lack of sun cast shadows bright.
And all I see is me
With no chance of the Great Light.
Looking into the glass,
Mostly dark are the days.
And it hurts the most because
What I desire isn't holding my gaze.
Blue eyes stained black cast cold glances.
And when I dare-
When I take the chance...
Death entreats me as I stare.

So my sight shifts and
for a moment I'm fine.
My eyes briefly glimpse
of the Man so Divine.
Too quickly He fades
Back to the glass my eyes fall
Anger rises.
This is not what I want at all.
So I take a deeper look
locking my resolve
determined to take stock
of the problems I need to solve

A smile that's cracked
spilling forth lies and deceit
Eyes that judge
looking down on the weak
Ears that push
the mute button too often
clogged with whispers
of He who's Fallen
Disgust brims over
into salf flavored twin rivers
My anger shakes me
and my reflection looking at me shivers

It's then I realize
I'm holding the glass tightly
my hands bound to the frame
white knuckles not budging slightly.
In shock I convulse in agony.
A deep-retching groan
starting and resounding
from somewhere within my very bone.
"This is not what I want!"
I yell-falling to my knees.
"Remove what is before me!"
I gasp for clean air to breathe.
A scream rips through my throat.
I slam the glass into the floor.
Over and over, repeatedly, once more.
Til my knuckles are bloody and sore.
Still my hands do not let go.
In despair, I sit and cry.
Droplets fall off my chin, splashing on broken glass.
I can't do this, I realize.

Then calloused, warm hands cover mine
Gently they release my pain-removing my grasp
from the broken frame.
The same hands cup my face
and a soothing voice calls me by name.
I'm free from the power of the mirror.
In my gratitude I glance
to the face of my savior.
"What can I do for you?"
I ask, thinking of a song or dance.

A gentle smile.
A soft chuckle.
His arms wrap around me
cradling me close to him.
"Sit with me and just Be."